How should doctors celebrate Christmas?

How should an anaesthesiologist celebrate Christmas? Sit in a corner with a book and a glass of milky liquid, adjusting the table intermittently, passing gas at all times.

How should an orthopedist celebrate Christmas? Turkey. Fork. Hammer.

How should an emergency physician celebrate Christmas? Turkey. Quick. Slash neck. Puncture chest. Tube in every orifice. Pepper. Salt. Call everyone now.

How should a pharmacist celebrate Christmas? Look at turkey. Go away. Open & close drawers, move bottles around. Come back when guests complain. Put turkeys in small bottles to share.

How should a paediatrician celebrate Christmas? Oh, look, turkey! Kucikucikuci. Googoogaga. Can I tickle u with this knife?

How should a plastic surgeon celebrate Christmas? “Hmm, I think I can augment this turkey breast.”

How should a radiologist celebrate Christmas? “Can someone switch off the lights please?”

How should an obstetrician celebrate Christmas? Turkey supine. Legs spread up. Hand into fillings and pull HARD. @obgynkenobi

How should a colorectal surgeon celebrate Christmas? Turkey prone. Legs down. Index finger in filling, wiggle, wiggle, pull finger out, look at finger.

How should a microbiologist celebrate Christmas? With culture and sensitivity. @5ftMunchkin

How should a GP celebrate Christmas? Kill turkey, stuff turkey, cook turkey, watch everyone else eat turkey. @obgynkenobi

How should an internist celebrate Christmas? Hmm, looks like turkey, smells like turkey, taste like turkey. Must be an African swallow.

How should a surgeon celebrate Christmas? This way.